Useful Definitions For Conservatives

Have you ever argued politics with a conservative counterpart and felt as if you were speaking two different languages? Well, you were. In order to bridge the divide, we have developed some definitions in the hopes of making things a bit easier.

con-serv-a-tive [kuhn-sur-vuh-tiv] –noun: A liberal who has not yet figured out how to think for himself/herself.

def-i-cit [def-uh-sit; Brit. also di-fis-it] –noun: The amount by which a sum of money falls short of the required amount, which only matters when a Democrat is elected to office.

fil-i-bus-ter [fil-uh-buhs-ter] –noun: The Republican’s health care plan.

sen-ate [sen-it] –noun: an assembly or council of citizens having the highest deliberative functions in a government, easily manipulated by a single Senator from Connecticut who craves power and attention.

sur-plus [sur-pluhs] –noun: A thing of the past.

con-sti-tu-tion [kon-sti-too-shuhn, -tyoo-] -noun: the system of fundamental principles according to which a nation, state, corporation, or the like is governed. Used to discourage health coverage to others, and promote guns. Frequently used as buzzword without ever being read by person using.

stim-u-lus [stim-yuh-luh s] -noun, plural-li: A trip to Argentina for a visit with your mistress, which could potentially cost you your job as Governor of South Carolina.

di-ver-si-ty [di-vur-si-tee, dayh-] –noun-plural-ties: The state or fact of being diverse; variety. Best adhered to by publishing ten rules and excluding everyone unwilling to abide.

gov-ern-ment [guhv-ern-muhnt, -er-muhnt] -noun: something evil and ineffective that needs to be limited to giving tax breaks for the rich, subsidies for powerful interests, and wars fought by the middle and lower-classes.

hy-poc-ri-sy [hi-pok-ruh-see] -no results found

Ken Kupchik
Air America

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